This ebook is available from this site. It is about how to identify a loser.
And, of course, if you know how to identify a loser, you would also know how to recognize its opposite - an achiever, a winner, a provider.
And even though university and college education is frequently mentioned in relation to success, this is not the only ingredient, often not even the most important one. There are many successful people who run businesses of their own, who are high achievers in the full meaning of this word and yet who never bothered about university education.
The "subject-matter" is presented from the girl's point of view. Quite obviously, guys are likely to have a different opinion when it comes to furnishing a "character reference" to one of their own - he is funny as hell, he is ready to join the "boys" for a "night out" or a card game, any time he is asked, he can have a dozen beers in one evening and still be able to make it home on his own and he also knows all the scores and schedules of every ball game in every league.
And he is also smart enough to dupe any bitch who was stupid enough to get involved with him!
He is a truly admirable man in every sense of this word!
We know all that stuff and that is why we do waste time writing about it.
That is why this book is written from a girls' point of view.
In this book you would not find an answer to the question - shall I marry a doctor or a lawyer or engineer, dentist, scientist, tradesman, pilot, military cadet, aspiring athlete?
It is not about categorizing men into professions and occupations, but into losers and achievers.
Besides, nobody ever faces such choices in life as to which professional from a list to marry!
In any case, it would be impossible to give a general answer to such questions, as it all depends on a person, but it is very much possible to give a definitive answer as to how to identify a loser.
After reading this book you would know how to identify a loser and thus to narrow down your choices when it comes to finding a man who is a high-achiever and a provider.
Everyone probably knows at least one example, when marriage or a marital relationship turned out to be a disaster. Here are a few real examples, most of which I heard from the girls in my class in nursing school, two of those girls are "featured" in this list:
A girl got married at 20 against the advice of ALL her relatives. Her sister was practically pleading with her not to marry that guy, but to no avail.
That relationship was a product of a school affair, which began, when she was about 14.
The guy turned out to be a total disaster, unable to hold any job; the longest period of time he worked was a clerk in some store. And he had no problem with practically flaunting an attitude that his in-laws have to find him a "good job".
That girl was supporting him most of the times they were together, they lived in their parent's house for a while, then renting a basement, till finally, after several years of this, she had finally had enough and left.
I do not know the details, but apparently her departure had preceded the formal separation and divorce.
She is very beautiful, very intelligent and hardworking. She went to college to study a certain computer-related business, did well there and is professionally employed, making very good money.
And yet somehow she was unable to see what everybody else around her could see very clearly. Moreover, she totally disregarded the advice of people who loved her and wished her nothing but the best.
And in the end of her ordeal she had to return to her parents and to practically beg forgiveness.
Her sister, incidentally, has made a perfect choice, her husband makes plenty of money and she does not have to work. She regularly goes with him to the company-sponsored conferences, which are routinely arranged in various resort areas. And so they essentially have several fully paid vacation trips per year. On top of that they also go on their regular vacations.
Their children go to private school.
Another girl went to live with one character, who was so seedy, it was practically written all over him.
Just over a year later he disappeared. By that time she had a little baby girl.
The guy, obviously, did not give a damn about her or the baby.
I do not know the details of that affair, I do not even know if they were legally married, but I would imagine the parents of that girl were trying to talk her out of it, but to no avail.
To illustrate how little appreciation she had of the true nature of that character, on at least one occasion she was showing his picture to her classmates in college, that's how I saw it myself.
She appeared to be really in love with that creep, even after he dumped her!
And yet just one look at that picture was enough to know who that guy really is! You can see plenty of such types in prisons.
Another girl, this one from a traditional family, from a certain country, where marriages are practically pre-arranged, went to live with a guy.
This was done against the threats from her parents that they would disown her if she brings such a disgrace on their family.
I guess she has been in Canada long enough to get sufficiently "westernized", just like her boyfriend. She is very beautiful, she looks quite literally as if she had just stepped off a page of a fashion magazine and I am sure lots of guys were trying to get involved with her in high school.
Six months into that common-law relationship, the guy dumped her and she ended up with a nervous breakdown. I do not know if she required professional medical or psychiatric help, but she was in a very serious trouble, she even went back to her country of origin for several months, apparently to unwind.
As for her family, they had delivered on their warning, they no longer wanted to know her.
To illustrate how seriously some cultures take such "transgressions", in India, for example, if neighbors find out that a couple is living in a common-law relationship, there can be a very serious potential for violence.
They will be quite literally thrown out from their dwelling, be that a house or a high-rise and police would not want to intervene against such a tide of popular sentiment.
Coming back to that girl, her judgement was nothing short of bizarre. She, obviously, did not think much about the feelings of her parents. She also did not bother to secure her relationship. "If you say you love me, why not get married? I am from another culture, I cannot disregard the wishes of my parents and that is why I expect from the man I love that he respects our values, which, incidentally, are universal values."
Unless she spells it out and unless he honors her wish, she is signing her life away to someone else's mercy.
Really, where is a guarantee that he would not use her as a sex toy and then simply throw her out, exactly what happened six months after she moved in with him.
Another woman had also married a volatile character against the advice of her parents, who were threatening to disown her if she disregards their wish. After five years and four children he disappeared and she had to go back to her parents.
In that particular case they did not deliver on the threat to disown her and so she was spared the indignity of having to live in a shelter.
One family had so much troubles with their daughter, it was practically an ongoing battle to make her understand that it is far too early to get into any relationship with guys at 16.
They have managed to succeed in every case, but it did cost them plenty of nerves.
Another girl somehow hooked up with a foreign student from a certain country, where the status of women is still like it was in the dark ages. He was going to return home after graduation.
And so, if that girl marries him, she would have to go there, as well.
Her parents have made a determined effort to break up that relationship and in the end they have succeeded.
That guy was threatening them at first, then he was apparently trying to poison himself, but in the end vanished from their life.
It is reasonable to assume that in their mind the parents of that girl have saved their daughter from the disastrous consequences of that relationship, if it were allowed to continue. Quite obviously, for a girl, who grew up in a "normal" country, it would be something inconceivable to be thrown into a culture that is centuries behind, as far as status of women is concerned.
In each of those cases it would be reasonable to ask - what is that those girls could not see what everybody else around them was seeing very clearly?
I believe it would be safe to say all those unfortunate events could happen only because the girls who ended up getting involved in them, had naive, infantile, unrealistic outlook on life. They did not seem to know anything else except instant gratification, taking every display of affection, every promise of eternal love at face value.
As for hard work, for planning ahead, responsibility for your actions, those were apparently not in their "vocabulary".
They would not even ask themselves the most simple question - where will I be ten years from now if I do it this way (go with this character).
I heard from one guy that when he bought a car in high school, his status at school had quite literally skyrocketed, one hard-to-get girl even slept with him.
What can you say? From his point of view this was indeed something to be proud of at that moment, but as far as the judgement of that girl is concerned, it was nothing short of a disaster.
Somehow she failed to realize that he was acting like an unbalanced character. Owning a car is not a league of teenagers. If we try to imagine a decision of the same "quality" in an adult world, it would probably be something at the level when someone buys a Mercedez while living in a rented apartment.
You have to take care of certain basics in life first. And for a guy in high school the priority should be not to buy a car, but to find out what he wants to do with his life, which university or college he wants to apply to, how much it will cost and where he is going to get the money.
Incidentally, that guy who bought a car in high school, was not doing very well later in life. He was working odd jobs, sometimes not working at all, he was living in a rooming house and had a very bad case of gambling addiction.
A guy clearly had no drive to succeed in life, and yet he was the first to buy a car in high school, which had greatly impressed many girls!
He lived in a rooming house till he was 44, then he moved out of that place and was not heard from again.
So much for impressing hard-to-get girls!
If a teenager takes a girl to an expensive restaurant in an attempt to show how much he loves her, it would be a total waste, as it is not his league, he simply does not have the means to build on that. He may be overall a good guy, just a little immature, but still, this level of engagement is not for high school, notwithstanding the fact that all those numerous Hollywood shows about high-passion relationships in high schools present a totally different picture.
And if a girl gets impressed by such extravagant things to the point that she hops into bed with that guy, she certainly needs to learn a few things.
As for that example with a guy living in a rented apartment and driving a Mercedez, it is not that far-fetched. One acquaintance told me he knows someone who rents a townhouse and drives a Jaguar.
Most people in that subdivision own their townhouses, but he has no money for that, and so he is renting. And yet he would not go for anything "less" than a Jaguar!
In another family, both wife and a husband were driving expensive cars, both were in their 50s. Wife was staying at home and did not really need a car, especially an expensive one, they could do all their shopping after hours. But no, they seemed to be determined to impress all their neighbors with two very expensive cars.
And then that man ended up in a hospital; as a result of that ordeal they were without income for several weeks and they were at the brink of a financial ruin, as there were absolutely no savings to cover for an emergency.
Getting a line of credit was apparently not an option, since they had no extra money to pay the interest, as well as those hefty fees, which are due for uninsured loan.
Those people were quite literally living hand-to-mouth with their extravagant lifestyle!
Why people demonstrate such judgement? Don't they know that you have to take care of certain basics in life first?
How can one explain that young girls offer themselves to rock stars, even to the VERY OLD rock stars?
One such very old rock star boasted (on TV) that he had over 500 girls, and he named the other one from the same band, who had even more; all those girls came over to see them on their own volition and they would not leave unless he "obliges" them.
And so he was doing exactly what those girls wanted, and his buddy was doing even "better".
You could almost see a mild disbelief on his face, as he was talking to an interviewer, it really looked out of this world to him, that something like this could possibly be happening!
When people are unable to understand the most basic situations in everyday life and to figure out what they need to do to keep themselves out of harms' way, psychiatrists call it a mental illness.
But when a seemingly normal girl imposes herself on a person who does not give a damn about her, who never saw her before and will never see her again, is this not a "clinical" level of one's inability to make the right judgement?
What could possibly be the source of such judgement? Isn't it obvious that falling into bed with an old rock star would not bring you any tangibles in life?
What could he possibly give to you? You cannot live with him, you cannot partake in his financial fortune, and even if he takes you, it would only be as a sex toy, with a waterproof prenuptial.
How can some girls possibly be so naive and care-free as not to think about the consequences of their actions?
How can they possibly hope to find a good marriage partner after they have been tainted like this?
"You say it did not work with that rock star! Do not despair! Here is a gold ring from me, a key to my house and the keys to my car!"
There was a story on TV when a very beautiful young woman married a certain sports star, got a baby from him, divorced him and sued for support, about $12,000 per month.
It appeared that she conceived that plan even before she married that man. But the court awarded custody to the father and she ended up with nothing, not even a "lifestyle support", as would likely have been a case in Canada.
In Canada, if a woman was married to a rich man, she is very likely to be awarded a "lifestyle" support in case of a divorce, even if there were no children from that marriage. The rationale is that she is not used to working and she cannot simply be abandoned "cold turkey".
There was a program on TV about a young woman whose boyfriend was a real mental case. Once, as their child was crying, he hit him in the head so hard that child ended up in a coma.
As one can well imagine, caring for a child in such a condition was taking lots of time and effort; that woman was not able to work and had to apply for social assistance.
Since there was no hope for an improvement in child's condition, she was trying to obtain a court order to allow him to die, which would also clear the way for upgrading the charge against her former boyfriend from aggravated assault to murder.
She was very attractive and intelligent young woman, why did she allow that creep into her life is quite simply incomprehensible!
There was a case in Canada when a man had killed his ex-wife and their two small children. She was a very attractive and hard-working woman.
And again, the same question comes to mind - why would a normal woman allow some creep into her life?
Or take those groupies, who hang around "trailer camps", where race car teams have their service trailers. Many of them are very beautiful girls, who are, no doubt, "in demand" in their high school or college. What is that they hope to find around a service trailer of a race car team?
If they secretly hope to marry a race car driver and to partake in his lifestyle, then it is very naive.
On one hand, by presenting themselves like that, they clearly show that they are losers, unable to create their own "process", to establish themselves in life, that they are almost desperate to hook on to someone else's life and they are willing to do it entirely on that party's terms.
On the other hand, what could they possibly find so exciting in the lifestyle of a race-car driver?
I knew one woman who was married to a race-car driver. She had spent plenty of time on a road, in "trailer camps", in hotels, in pits.
At first it was interesting, almost exciting, but soon it became boring and then practically unbearable - all those hotels, hot dogs and pop during the day, restaurant food in evenings, watching the members of the service team on their daily "boozing sessions", exchanging the daily load of the same stale gossip and the same stale "news", day after day after day.
Soon she was so utterly fed up with that, she could not take it any more!
By her own admission, only a hopeless airhead can enjoy that kind of a lifestyle, where you are your husband's "accessory" in the true meaning of that word, accompanying him to all those races, standing by that trailer, watching the service team bring the car to condition, buying boxes of hot dogs, coffee and pop for them, watching all those motor-oil ads being retouched on the trailer and the race car, while not being able to have a productive life of her own, to have a rewarding career.
She is a very intelligent and energetic woman and, of course, it was impossible for her to lead this kind of a lifestyle.
I also knew a guy who lead a similar lifestyle, while on a sailboat team, and he was enjoying it greatly! However, his stint there was relatively short, this was only during several sailing competitions, each of which lasted just a few days.
Plus that guy is a completely different type, he was definitely not career-minded and he was not in a habit of thinking ahead, trying to reflect on his life, where will he be five, ten years later.
He was recalling those days with great affection, especially a night when they had a food fight in a restaurant.
And somehow it did not occur to him that he was not getting anywhere, while on that sailboat or while having fun with that food fight!
He was just one of the flunkies on that sailboat, it belonged to a rich man, an owner of a construction company. That man had enough drive to build a successful business enterprise, and he began to enjoy the fruits of his labor only after he had got it made.
As for the flunkeys on his "sailing team", they were being tolerated only while they were doing as told.
That guy who was so enjoying his life on a sailboat had never finished college, he worked odd jobs, still living in a rooming house when he was over 40, he was a compulsive gambler, always on a lookout for bargain fares to Vegas on a charter plane, frequently going to Atlantic City, spending an entire summer there at least once (the same guy who was the first to buy a car in high school)
It would be reasonable to assume that for a person with such a mindset, it would be very exciting to be spending time in trailer parks, in hotels, in service pits, on a race track. Such people see it as a great adventure when they have an opportunity to go places.
And, considering his mindset and his mental development, he probably did not even realize that he was looking at the whole thing with the eyes of a child.
Such people are unable to see beyond appearances, to ask themselves the most basic question - where will I be ten years from now?
He feels excitement of the car-racing competition, he watches the service team rehearsing the process of changing wheels, doing it over and over again in preparation for a Big Day, with everybody living on adrenaline.
All that somehow totally obscures reality in his head.
And the simple reality is that ten years later you will be nowhere if you continue like this.
It is almost like small boys playing "war". It is all very exciting for them, but as soon as they grow up, they frantically begin to look for ways to avoid draft.
Suddenly a war is no longer "exciting"!
I would imagine that those groupie-girls, who congregate around trailer parks, envy the wives of the race-car drivers, who are often shown on TV, with babies in their hands and, of course, it is very obvious that they do not have to work.
And that fact is apparently very appealing to some girls.
If that is indeed the case, this can only mean that those girls have no drive, no desire to succeed, they are unable to create a productive process of their own, to build their lives, to control their destiny.
In other words, they expect to get what they want while not knowing anything else than instant gratification, which, of course is a pipe dream.
We had a girl like that in school. The guys found her very beautiful, especially those who could not see beyond her face and her legs. And so much attention had practically destroyed her, she became a real airhead! She never went to college and continued her promiscuous lifestyle after graduation from high school.
Then she became pregnant and it turned out that she was facing a real prospect of not being able to indicate on a birth certificate who is child's father. She and her mother pleaded with the guy, who they claimed was a father to allow to put his name on a birth certificate and that they are not going to claim any child support.
But he flatly refused, moreover, he humiliated them by saying that during that week when she got pregnant she had very likely been with several other guys, as was her usual pattern.
And he added that if they try to get support through a court order, he will spill plenty of unfavorable information in his statement.
And so that high-school beauty queen had lived in an utter misery hereafter, with no family, no decent income and no father's name on a birth certificate of her child.
Everybody probably heard of a case, when a certain well-known woman married a very rich old man.
It would be reasonable to assume that she wanted to have an easy life, not having to work, not having financial worries.
There were enough "newsworthy" happenings in her life after that marriage, enough to fill many pages of those publications, which make a living from the gossip about the "rich and famous".
The end of a road for that woman was a death at a relatively young age, even at a younger age than Elvis, her body "stuffed" with prescription medications.
A woman who is willing to marry an old billionaire clearly has no drive or ability to succeed. She somehow thinks that money is everything.
The results of that misconception are always predictable - a life without goals, life without achievements, an empty life in every respect.
But some women seem to be willing to do better than simply acting out on their hormones.
Here is an example, which shows to what extent some women are prepared to go to attract a suitable partner:
I knew one woman who was in her mid- to late-twenties when I first met her. She came to Canada on her own, she had no family here and could thus only rely on her own resources. She was working two jobs (the second one could have been a short shift only); as soon as she finishes one at 5 pm, she takes a bus and goes to another, which starts at six.
One was a factory job, the other one janitorial, cleaning offices and washrooms in a big warehouse.
There was another person at that job, he had a car and he was normally working till 4 am. The last bus was passing that point at midnight. A ride home in a cab could well have cost her 3-hour wages.
Such were her choices.
If she was taking the last bus and coming home at 1 am, she might not be able to go to bed till after 2 am, maybe not even till after 3. If the factory job was full-time, she had to be there no later than 8 am. Many factories start the morning shift at 7:30, some even earlier.
I saw that woman at a bus stop, I heard her talking on a cellular phone, and since I speak her language, that's how I addressed her, we started talking and that's how I found out about her life. (I don't know how good was her English, as I never heard her speaking it.)
She was very pretty, but looked very tired, almost to the point of being sick.
Because of work pressures she was probably unable to eat a normal meal while away from home. Any time I would see her on a bus stop, she was eating pastry from a coffee shop and she was carrying a big thermos with coffee, apparently to keep her awake on that janitorial job.
Coffee is absolutely the worst stuff one can use to stay awake, calcium and magnesium pills are much better, they are "in tune" with physiology and they can give you the REAL energy.
I do not know where she was filling that thermos, maybe she made arrangements to buy it at at discount without cups at that coffee shop, where she was also buying pastry. The pastry was in the paper bags of that coffee shop; she apparently did not have time to buy pastry in a supermarket, which would have been much cheaper.
From the way she walked, it appeared that she had a bad case of endometriosis, which would hardly be surprising, considering the pressures of two jobs and her diet.
That woman, obviously, wanted to earn enough money to be able to afford a decent place, where she could invite friends and thus to get to know some suitable men, and she was prepared to pay a heavy price for that.
Obviously, endometriosis, if she indeed had it, wasn't a part of her "calculations" when she was signing up for that second job, it was just an unfortunate fallout.
But if we disregard the severe health consequences of her choice, her judgement was markedly superior as compared to what some girls demonstrate by jumping into a serious relationship or even marriage with guys who are clearly not suitable.
I am sure that, considering how attractive that woman was, she could have found some character for a transient relationship, thus not having to work two jobs. But, of course, having been tainted with a casual relationship, she might never be able to find a suitable match later.
Such was a short preamble to the skill of identifying a loser.
This is a very important life skill and every girl should have a perfect command of it.
If you possess this skill, if you have enough resolve and determination in applying it, in acting upon your findings, it would help you to take control of your life by denying all kinds of useless people access to your person and to your resources.
This means you would have more opportunities to build your life, to do what is best for you, without interference from people who should not be a part of your life, the people who are losers and thus are not suitable, not desirable.
If you know how to identify them, if you have enough determination to deny them access to your person, they will not be draining your resources, they will not be tarnishing your image, they will be out of your life!
This is an important ingredient of personal success!
The skill and ability to identify undesirables and the determination of not letting them interfere with your life is especially important when it comes to selecting a marriage partner.
Marriage is the most important decision a woman can make in her life. It requires a sound judgement, plenty of personal skills and hard work in developing your personality and establishing yourself as a desirable choice among eligible men.
Selecting a marriage partner is an ultimate test of your life skills!
The stakes are high and the consequences of a bad judgement can be hard to live with.
As a matter of fact, those consequences can be so disastrous, that you may never recover and spend the rest of your life in poverty and misery. And on top of that you would feel utterly humiliated.
The aforementioned cases of girls and young women who ended up making bad judgement when getting involved with men, are a good illustration of what can happen when people are not careful enough, when they get detached from reality.
Selecting a marriage partner is not like taking a car for a "test drive". It is much more than that! His true nature may not reveal itself to the fullest till after several years into the relationship, when, after years of torment you would finally realize that it cannot continue like this any longer.
"Disengaging" from him at that point would be very painful, very expensive and very traumatic for your children.
And unless you approach the process of selecting a marriage partner with a perfect calculation and perfect judgement, you are running unnecessary risk of untoward developments.
Earlier on this page a case of a very unfortunate marriage was described. The woman who got stuck in it is very beautiful and very bright. She is a hard-worker and high-achiever, and she had managed to get very high in her field of professional endeavor, making plenty of money in the corporate world.
But even though she possessed all those qualities, her judgement with regards to marriage turned out to be a total disaster. As a result, she got badly burned and had not been able to find a suitable partner after that.
It is very painful when you stumble so bad, especially if you stumble because of your own bad judgement, as was the case with her, when she had plunged into that marriage against the advice of all her relatives.
This book can make a big difference in every girl's life. It can spare you from a disaster of getting stuck with some creep and getting to "taste" everything that comes with it!
At this point one may ask - where do you put love with such an approach?
Here is an example to illustrate love without the fabric of financial security:
Everyone have seen security guards at shopping malls. Obviously, there are security guards at many other places, but we can easily see those who deal directly with public.
And so here is a security guard at a shopping mall, he is a very likeable guy, everybody says "Hello" to him when he arrives there in the morning. And when he goes home at the end of a day, everybody says "Good-bye" to him.
But would you want to marry someone who is not programmed for success and is only able to reach that far?
Let's imagine a girl who was unable to control her hormones and had fallen in love at 16, got married soon after she graduated from high school, only to discover, that her sweetheart has no drive to succeed in life.
How long can that relationship realistically continue before she would start comparing her lot against that of the girls who were smart enough not to get involved with guys in high school, but to "market" themselves to those who have proven that they are achievers?
I guess that answers this question about how to "connect" love with such an attitude!
Love is still the guiding principle for a relationship, but you look for your love in those places, where you are likely to find an achiever.
Girls who do not understand that the adolescent love has no place in an adult life, are carrying very serious misconceptions in their heads!
Adolescent love is similar in many respects to when small children are having fun by jumping in puddles. They are thoroughly enjoying the experience and, as one can well imagine, the laundry is not on their minds!
The aforementioned examples of girls and young women, who have been badly burned when they approached marital relationship with an eye of an adolescent, speak for themselves.
It is true that sometimes people have very serious attraction to each other. They cannot even describe it to themselves, but attraction is nevertheless very real.
Well wait till that guy reaches employment age, what will he be doing? Wearing coveralls with his name on a breast pocket? Breathing noxious fumes at some factory forty hours every week? And then losing even that job after getting caught doing horseplay with others like him?
Some may say that if a girl is not pretty, she would not have much to choose from, and so any advice in this area has to be taken with great skepticism.
Well, this is a defeatist attitude!
You are what you think you are, not what other think of you!
And any girl with drive and determination to succeed can be anything she wants!
If you talk to a mature man, he would tell you that when guys begin to support themselves, when they get to taste the real life, their perceptions about women change very dramatically.
It is a fact of life that teenaged boys are unable to see beyond a pretty face, long legs and certain other parts of the anatomy.
But this is very immature, very naive and such perceptions get shattered into pieces soon after the boys grow up and begin to earn their own living.
Very soon after that they begin to learn to see and appreciate personality.
Here is an example - at one place where I used to work, there was a young woman, acting in a capacity of a receptionist, an office manager and executive assistant; it was a small place, some dozen employees.
She was very outgoing, very pleasant, always knew what to say and it was always to the point.
She would always say "thank you" when you bring the shipping / receiving documents to her or any other materials and it did not at all look that this simple "thank you" was conveying some order of subordination.
She took effort to know every employee by name, even though she had relatively little contact with people in the factory area.
Less than a week after she started, she even had to ask me for the name of an employee she wanted to talk to.
It might look somewhat funny, but it was definitely a better alternative than coming to talk to that person without knowing his name.
When we were doing a rehearsal of an ISO audit, with myself acting as a mock auditor, she was producing all the documents and all the answers as if it was a real thing, and you would not see it on her face that she finds it even a little demeaning.
A job is a job, she takes it seriously and she is valued greatly by her employer for that.
And overall, a woman like that would impress any [mature] man with her sophistication and her command of "people skills"!
Her predecessor, on the other hand, did not have many such qualities. I belive I never heard her saying "thank you" when I was bringing various papers to her.
Once, when she was leading around a high-school girl, who was on her one-day school assignment to get a taste of a real business enterprise, she came to my station to introduce that girl and she said "I am sorry, I forgot your name."
By that time she was there for at least six months!
And so I felt I was "entitled" to respond in kind and I said - "I am Peter", and a moment later I added, "Actually, it is John, sorry".
A woman who deals with others at this level of "sophistication" would have to be a beauty queen of a Hollywood caliber in order to evoke the same feelings from men as compared to a woman, who knows how to shape events around her.
Coming back to adolescent boys and their misconceptions about girls and life in general, here is an illustration of how immature they can be:
some boys, in attempt to develop facial hair begin to shave as early as 14-15, when they still have mostly baby hair on their chins.
The idea apparently is that with the hair follicles being stimulated by regular shaving, they would begin to develop earlier.
Some also shave their chests with the same idea in mind.
Some even go as far as massaging the face and the chest with a wet towel! That is another trick to stimulate the hair follicles.
As one can well imagine, their perceptions about girls are at the same level of "sophistication".
There is a certain website which has a picture of an unimaginably beautiful girl (poster girl of the Cannon Corporation). The guy, who is the webmaster of that site, is asking - does anybody know who she is?
It so happened that he would like to find her, to marry her and he is prepared to go to the other end of the world looking for her.
And then he lists his own "good qualities", that he is a very good person, very good-natured, very likeable and he would always pet a cat or dog, if he sees one. (He does not say, though, how much money he makes)
The guy looks normal, and yet he somehow sees no problem with flaunting the perception of the world and of women, which is more akin to those of an adolescent boy.
Obviously, there is such category as pretty girls, but whether or not a serious man would want to marry one is another story.
Beauty is like a big lottery win. It is certainly very desirable and it can be very rewarding, but it can also utterly destroy a person.
And there are great many pretty girls who have been so spoiled by the displays of attention from boys in school, that they have never developed a drive required to succeed in life. You can see plenty of them working as cashiers in supermarkets.
And believe me, no serious man would want to stay with a woman, whose full-time occupation is getting bored!
In any case, this is a big subject and there is a separate chapter about it in the book.
There was an "ad" on one "upscale" erotic website that one woman who was a regular "contributor" had announced that she is open to marriage proposals from eligible men.
But apparently there were no takers, because some time later that appeal was "upgraded" to a more pressing message. It was already saying - "Come on guys, you would not find a prettier face and longer legs than this babe has!"
Would a serious man take a woman with such a "resume"?
She had demonstrated absolutely no desire or drive to build a rewarding career, the only skill she has is to strip naked in front of a camera.
It really makes you wonder what she does IN BETWEEN those photo-shoots!
I would say that the dreams of that woman and her actions were seriously out of touch with reality. But when a girl falls in love in high school and is unable to examine that guy and her relationship with him with an eye of a mature person, this detachment from reality is also very profound and it can have catastrophic consequences.
This book can be useful to many people, but still, the target audience are young girls, 16-19, maybe early twenties, who are beginning to get involved with guys.
It would help them to make the right selection, and, should the need be, to suspend their involvement with "available" guys till they get to college or university.
During young age the hormones are in high tide and they may well take control. Should that happen, the mind gets overpowered and is no longer capable of protecting young girls from a disastrous relationship.
And the simple reality is that better no guys till you get to college or university, than the bad ones, those who can ruin your life!
This decision may not be easy on a "hormonal" level, but unless a girl learns to think with her mind, she simply cannot make a sound judgement and thus is running unnecessary risks of getting involved with creeps and losers.
After watching all those Hollywood movies and TV serials about high-passion relationships in high school, teenagers are conditioned to believe that unless you are "involved", you are not "in", you are not "in demand", you are not attractive, not popular, you are a nerd, not handsome, and overall very much "behind times".
Well, that is Hollywood, a dream factory, but the simple fact of the real life is that in high school all guys look pretty much the same, simply because there is nothing to prove yourself on. Curriculum is a joke, not even on the same scale with university, and so, unless someone is an outright retard, he would get his high-school diploma without much problem.
But five years after school you can already begin to tell who is who, when you see that some guys took factory jobs, started working shifts, started wearing coveralls, breathing dust and noxious fumes, while others graduated from colleges and universities.
Ten years after school there is a very clear distinction between losers and achievers. And you definitely would not want to suddenly "wake up" and realize that you got stuck with a loser and that this is a "life sentence"!
An alternative to that, if you can stomach it, would be to divorce him and to start raising your children alone, hopefully, with some handouts from your parents and child support, whatever you would be able to get from his minimum wage.
Or he may abandon you even before you start evaluating that "alternative". As you can well imagine, the words "responsibility", "achievement", "planning" are not in a vocabulary of a loser.
This group appeared to be killing time in a park. It certainly did not look like any of them was employed.
Obviously, each one of them has made his or her decision as to what they want to do in life and there is nothing really to add to that.
The question is - would a normal girl want to marry any of these types?
We can sure imagine the answer, and yet some girls are not nearly careful enough when getting into relationships with guys without bothering to ask themselves the most basic question - is he programmed for success, is he an achiever or is he a loser?
This picture was taken in an upscale subdivision in Toronto, many of those houses would go for half a million, there are also bigger ones next street, those may well go for a million.
Even if we take the lowest loser, someone who holds a nondescript job just above the minimum wage and rents a hole somewhere, and ask him - what is better - to own a house or to live in a place where he lives, you can be sure he knows the answer! And yet he is unable to imagine a life without ball games, without cards and buddies, without beer, without his dog, without Bingo, without hanging out in the "hood" for hours every day, as well as doing many other things of the same "sophistication".
Life without all those things to him is on the borderline of insanity. That's how a loser sees it.
Well, they have made their choice and there is nothing really to add to that. The question I am always asking in this book is - would a normal girl want to marry one of those?
Here is a very educational and illustrative exercise - go to a convenience store on Saturday evening and hang around for a while (in warm weather, of course). Or simply observe it from inside your [parents] car.
You would see that this is where the "cheap crowd" congregates. They have no money for an upscale entertainment, and so they hang around convenience stores, buying cigarettes, pop, maybe ice cream, a chewing gum, scratch-and-lose lottery tickets, exchanging the load of the latest gossip with other losers, discussing ball and puck games, as well as "visiting stars" in the local strip clubs.
You can also see women there, girlfriends and wives of those characters.
Have a good look at those types! You can get stuck with a similar one unless you are careful!
Buy this ebook today and get armed with very useful, even though rather "politically incorrect" presentation of how to identify a loser.
The information in this ebook can certainly "shake up" and "straighten out" many girls who may be a bit too care-free, when it comes to getting involved with guys.
The price of this ebook is $9 US.
Please note that this ebook will only function on Windows systems (98 and higher)
I regret I have to abandon the Mac market, but the only way to include Mac would be to go with PDF, but that format has a poor contrast, unless the file size is made very large.
Having to read substantial amounts of low-contrast text on a blinding-white background is also tiring for the eyes.
No wonder there are so many products on the market, which transform PDFs into other formats!
PDFs do not render many formatting features, which are routine in HTML (web page language).
But the pages of this ebook look like normal webpages, with crisp fonts in several colors and an eye-pleasing background.
My understanding is that it would not work on Linux or its variations either.
I would like to add, however, that since the working knowledge base in this loser-identification business is very manageable, MAC or Linux users may well consider asking friends to use their computers, as it would not take much time to read the book, it is not that big, a few evenings is all you would need.
Please note that ebook needs an activation password to unlock its contents. The first page has the instructions regarding the activation procedure.
A copy of that page is available on this site
Regarding the passwords, you can rest assured that I will not abandon you with ebook, which needs to be activated because you would like to install it on another computer.
If you need a password, you will get it, even several years after the original purchase. The only catch here is that you would be asked to download a new version of ebook and get a password for that one.
The software (ebook) is distributed on an "AS IS" basis
The full text of the Terms of Use is available at my site www.IDLoser.com
This is a standard disclaimer that is used to sell software products. Quite obviously, the software authors put the utmost care into creating their products, but in order to take into account the circumstances beyond their control, they have to protect themselves with such disclaimers.
Two sample chapters are available on this site:
Can the 'late starters' realistically turn their lives around?
Observing the guys, Part 2
A copy of the Foreword is also available, and can also be considered a sample chapter, because it describes additional important points about the ebook.
If you buy this ebook, you are welcome to have my ebook about accent reduction FREE
more info is available on my site noAccent.net
Or you can have this CD at half price ($5 instead of $9.95)
The price includes shipping anywhere in the world by airmail.
CD contains more than 500 high-resolution pictures of India, the kind of pictures a tourist on an organized visit is unlikely to see.
There are also 89 very colorful, high-resolution pictures from various Hindu wedding ceremonies.
more info on is available on my site India300.com
If you would like to buy this CD together with the ebook, then you do not go through the normal purchase process, but please remit $14 as a PayPal money transfer to me and I will supply a download link.
My PayPal business name is SeeSunrise.com, that Internet domain is registered in my name.
This link points to the actual order page, which has a PayPal payment button. The order page is on my site noAccent.net, which has a valid SSL certificate, thus allowing a secure, encrypted communication with a payment processor.
The main reason why the order page is on the other site is because PayPal only allows ONE return page, even if you are selling several products.
After the order is completed, the customer is returned to the "thank-you" page with the download information, as well as other information for the customers.
My site noAccent.net is configured as a hub site for all the order pages of my products, as well as the return page.
Theoretically it could be possible to arrange every order page on its respective site, but then a separate SSL certificate would be required for each, thus adding to the expense and maintenance, plus making it impossible to host those sites as aliased domains. Hosting via aliased domains is a very convenient feature and can significantly reduce hosting expenses, especially if one has a dozen sites, like I do.
This site is hosted as a primary domain on its own hosting plan and so it the site noAccent.net. However, my site India300.com is hosted as an aliased domain and thus cannot have an SSL certificate. But this is not a barrier if the order page is on another site.
And overall, I believe that if a customer was placing an order from one site, but once the order had been processed, he ended up on another site, that would be somewhat confusing, unless he knows the reasons for that.
I thank you for your business and I wish you success in putting the information in this ebook to your best advantage!